There is no sense in denying the powerful effect someone’s lush hair or a ravishing smile can have on leaving a memorable first impression. But despite its mighty reputation, this first impression, or your appealing exterior alone cannot conceal your mindset. And this is where your attitude of self-appreciation comes into play.

The fickle nature of looks will always be trumped by the mesmerising awe your confidence can inspire. Even if you are unhappy with your appearance and working towards changing it to a healthy extent, it’s your “innerhood” that will dominate how attractive you are to others, which coincidentally, should never be your main motivator to look or feel a certain way.

1. Confidence is associated with authenticity

Genuinely self-assured individuals feel no need to emulate others – they are boldly devoted to their true selves, without ever trying to mimic anyone around them. They can be inspired by other confident individuals, both famous and those in their immediate surroundings, but they use this inspiration to find yet another authentic way of expressing themselves.

Their self-esteem, therefore, never depends on the way other successful and strong people are perceived. And perhaps most importantly, their integrity and inner stability can never be threatened by anyone else’s existence or perceived superiority. In fact, the comparison is not a part of their natural perception of the world, as they cherish their freedom to be who they truly are, no matter what others might or might not be. And who can resist an authentic persona?

2. Confidence means self-acceptance

Or even more so, it’s the willingness and eagerness to enjoy yourself thoroughly, in every sense of the word. When you are confident, your looks don’t play a key role in your behaviour. This means that even if you have a sizeable tush or you’re missing an arm, people will dwell on your demeanour rather than whatever you might believe to be your imperfection.

Moreover, these imperfections are never your pivotal quality for defining yourself. When you embrace every aspect of your being, you exude a level of self-acceptance that invites others to accept you for who you are, as you feel no need to hide or minimise your flaws. Clearly, self-pity has never been on anyone’s list of desirable qualities, and for a good reason.

3. Confidence is chemistry

Not to get into the complexity of the prefrontal cortex and its role in giving your confidence a chemical, biological basis, your brain can truly play mind games with your feeling of self-worth (allow me this one, wonderful pun). Those who steer clear of challenging, emotionally risky situations falsely believe that they are on the safe side of love.

But confident people aren’t fearless when it comes to rejection, they are simply eager to take the leap of faith, which gives them a serotonin boost. This handy little hormone of happiness is also cleverly named the confidence molecule, and people who keep challenging themselves thus reinforce the feeling of accomplishment and self-worth, which translates to a very attractive chemistry people around you will sense. Is there anything more attractive than happiness?

4. Confidence inspires action

Unlike insecurity, which can make you feel powerless and paralysed, confident people exude an attitude of control. Their hands-on behaviour can at times seem aggressive to those who don’t share the same level of confidence, but they simply like taking charge of situations.

While you might be wondering how to attract a man you like, keep in mind that confidence allows you to act precisely the way you feel without feeling or showing desperation or insecurity, and it lets you act on those feelings despite the risk of being rejected. These experiences don’t shatter your self-esteem because it’s based on inner values and beliefs as opposed to an isolated occurrence.

5. Confidence is attitude

It’s in your every word, and it’s almost palpable. The way you sit up straight, make eye contact, speak and enunciate clearly, laugh openly, express yourself boldly, walk with your head held high, dance as if no one is watching, behave in a self-caring manner and base your life on healthy choices, because you appreciate and cherish yourself and your wellbeing.

And those who witness your consistent self-expression in every aspect of your life can do little but admire your integrity. It is also deeply rooted in how you treat others, with respect and care, and anyone who feels like your equal even when you take an opposing stand will be attracted to your honesty. It’s refreshing and tangible, the way confidence can allow you to treat others as well as yourself.

Finally, your genuine self-love will outlast any physical imperfection, deformity or change. Even as you age and your youthful attractiveness transforms into mature, profound beauty that is primarily based on your inner worth, this confidence will be your most valuable attribute. Its powerful allure will stand out and endure all the challenges of life, and it will not fade with the passage of time.

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Author: Nicole Noel

Nicole is an avid traveller passionate about healthy living and interior design. In her free time she enjoys designing furniture and jewellery. She loves to share everything she learns. You can find her on Twitter and Facebook.

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